I used to think the next world war might be started by escalations of tensions in the Middle East, or North Korea having a bad day. Now I think it's more likely to be Donald Trump accidentally butt-dialing some random leader with nuclear weapons.
Trump's top five next phone calls:
5. Darth Vader. “Love that death star, big as a
planet. Very bigly. Every country should have a death star.”
4. Sauron: “Where'd you get that big eye thing? It's yuuuge. Gotta get
one of those for Trump Tower.”
3. Hans Gruber: “Some say you’re just a common thief. I
think you’re a terrific thief. Exceptional, just terrific.”
2. Goldfinger: “You think that Oddjob fella could give my
cabinet some henchmen lessons?”
1. Gru: “Hey, you’re despicable and I’m deplorable! We gotta
get you into my cabinet. Hear you’re interested in the moon. How’d you like to
be head of NASA?”
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