5. Yesterday was the vernal equinox, which means that on that day, presidential candidates spent equal amounts of time pandering to the left and the right.
4. “Kristen,” Eliot Spitzer’s pricey pal, got so warm she was forced to take off her clothes. (SFW)
3. A harried-looking bunny frantically tries to get an early flight back from his Cancun vacation, muttering “why didn’t anyone tell me Easter was so freakin’ early this year?”
2. Spring cleaning gets underway in Washington, as the administration scrubs hard drives and files shiny-clean and free of any dusty old information that Congress might want to subpoena.
1. The weather’s so nice, politicians are holding their “admission of a sex scandal” press conferences outside.
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