In news of manmade disasters this week, there’s NBC, with its ratings in the tank, a PR debacle, and suddenly finding itself with five hours of prime time to fill. Earlier this week Jay Leno noted NBC stands for “Never Believe your Contract.” Hmmm . . .
Top five other things NBC really stands for:
5. Nothing But Clueless
4. Numbskulled Brainless CEOs
3. Not Being Clever
2. Nonplussed By Conan
1. Now Broadcasting Crap
Hey, put that all together and it makes a sentence! The programming geniuses at the network are rapidly filling those time slots with some sure-fire hits.
Top five new NBC primetime shows:
5. Sarah Palin is a plucky hockey mom turned Alaskan bush pilot in the comedy-adventure “A Wink and a Prayer.”
4. Pat Robertson blames natural disasters on the victims’ contracts with the devil on his new show, “The 666 Club.”
3. Conan O’Brien interviews other people suddenly thrown out of work in the depressingly hilarious talk show, “American Idle.”
2. Tiger Woods is pursued by 25 women in the new reality dating show, “The Soon-to-be-Bachelor.”
1. “CSI: Critter Scene Investigation.” NBC wants cheap? They get cheap. This one’s a webcam on my deck. Dean opened the patio door this morning to find three raccoons perched on the railing. They’re back, and they’re bringing friends. My camera batteries were dead, so I'll recharge and be ready to get a mug shot if they return to the scene of the crime.
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