Top five highlights of Groundhog Day:
5. All those hilarious “Gobbler’s Knob” jokes.
4. In an effort to grab the spotlight, local squirrels predict six more weeks of “being chased up trees all the time by that damned Woody.”
3. The North Dakota version: you either get an early spring, or six more months of winter.
2. The Montana version: by sunrise the groundhog’s been shot and field-dressed, but technically it’s still casting a shadow.
1. Punxsutawney Phil’s confident prediction: six more weeks of squabbling about the stimulus bill.
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