Lindsay, honey. You’re not the first Hollywood starlet whose life careened out of control. You won’t be the last. But you may be the only one to compare a brief jail/rehab stint to the plight of an Iranian woman who may be stoned to death. Lindsay, seriously. One of these things is not like the other one.
Lindsay Lohan’s top five excuses:
5. Mean Girls put me up to it.
4. Can’t let ex-jailbird Paris Hilton one-up me on the skank-o-meter.
3. I’ll just pull a Freaky Friday. Enjoy your 90 days, Jamie Lee!
2. Hey, my manicurist is Korean. That’s the name of her salon.
1. Was sure I’d get a pointless but much-hyped one-hour TV special yesterday. Damn you, LeBron James!
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