Testifying in front of Congress is boring. There’s all that “swearing in” business, as if there’s such a thing as “truth” anymore anyway. Then a bunch of guys in suits glare at you over the top of their reading glasses. At least Joe Barton had the decency to apologize to BP, but after catching some flak he backtracked. Congressmen used to have integrity. When they were bought, they stayed bought.
Thank goodness there’s Twitter to help BP execs while away the question-dodging, finger-pointing, obfuscating hours:
5. Oh no, fail whale! Wait – not Twitter’s, just dead one in Gulf. Whew!
4. Made funny joke about adding vinegar, herbs to turn oil spill into yummy salad dressing. No laughs. Tough room.
3. We can blame this on the Dutch and Norwegians, right? @SarahPalin, DM me!
2. Asked to explain “small people” comment. Answer “Randy Newman fan” not well received.
1. Glad they keep showing picture of pelican, ‘cause it really makes our point. Hey bird, give us back our oil!
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