Just keeping things handy . . .

Why does Sarah Palin write her talking points on her hand? Because she can. Who needs stupid things like “nuanced answers” containing “facts” when you can boil it down to four three empty catchphrases? Simple thoughts for simple people.

Top five things other people are writing on their hands:

5. Jay Leno: 10 pm 11:30 pm

4. Conan O’Brien: 11:30 pm Sleep in, eat Cheetos, repeat.

3. Tiger Woods: I’m sorry. So sorry. So very, very sorry. (continued on other hand)

2. John Mayer: I’m stupid. So stupid. So very, very stupid. (continued on other hand)

1. Brett Favre: Working Retired Working. Go Packers Jets Vikings

I would have included Glenn Beck but I don’t know how to make an insanely complicated batsh*t-crazy conspiracy diagram in HTML.